do you ever just want to freeze how you feel? just for a moment when it seems like you've somehow connected with sheer satisfaction and are whole with the world around you? and photograph that space so that whenever you want, you can look at what was around you and feel forever, like you did just then? tonight, the moon was in all it's fullness and i wanted so badly to have a snapshot of all my senses.
i wish i could save that feeling and know that i could revisit it whenever i want or need to be reminded of just how complete God is- and that He died for me, broke Himself and ripped away from warmth, for me, so that i could have that perfect intimacy and satisfaction with Him, one day. and then many, many more days and moments and sunsets and full moons after that.

one of the beautiful things about knowing God is building a trust, because building that trust weaves my being into an intimacy with God that He created me to crave.

the more i ask for help and direction and vulnerable wants- that seem like they have no possible way of ever being met- the more i tie myself to a God who wants me. a God who show ups. Always. Every time. Saving the day. Delivering a crisp moon on a cold winter night's drive home.

my heart is probably more open that it's ever been. and that is a comfortable place for me. that is a place of peace and rest and self-control. even more trustworthy, is knowing that my open heart is not struggling or scouting to find someone who will tell me who i am or where i should go or what the right thing to do is. this open heart is protected and strong in the Spirit, knows wisdom to be honest and make discerning choices and lastly, an ability, from the work of His hands, to thrive. thank you Jesus for believing in me.